Why do I care, why do I let it bother me?

Well first of all, it's been a few days or more....what's new - right?? It has been several days of very cold weather. We were at Lazy 5 Ranch yesterday with Jeremy's class and it was freezing but really fun! I will try to post a few pictures when I get a chance. One little girl that I just love (and was in his class last year too), fell off the back of the wagon and I just felt so bad for her. She was probably petrified, considering she was in the middle of a field with tons of animals. The wagon driver didn't hear and kept going, it took several shouts for him to finally stop. Mrs. Womack held her while she cried....I guess days like that make me think about my old desire to be a teacher....to be able to help kids learn and make them feel better. But then reality sits in, and I realize that although I love kids, I couldn't do it ALL DAY, EVERY DAY!

I have done good getting back on the wagon with walking this week (no pun intended, lol). So Far I have done 11 miles and am scheduled to do 6 more tomorrow. I just finished 5 this evening and my feet were SORRRRRE when I got back home. I can't wait until I can afford another pair of shoes. I will probably need 2 pairs between now and May.

I took the boys to the orthodontist yesterday. The guy is new here in NC, but has had a practice up in Boston for the past 11. Everybody was wonderful, the place is amazing and even has a game room and PSPs at each dental chair (the boys were THRILLED). I wasn't too thrilled with the price, but he is about the cheapest I have found, and is willing to TRY to work out some payment arrangements. I was hoping to pay off our Lowes bill with my first tuition reimbursement check, but it looks like I will be giving him a down payment so we can get started. The boys teeth are a bit more jacked up then I thought. SIGH.

Wondering about my Title of this blog yet??? LOL....it was the first thing that came to my mind, but before I expanded I wanted to give myself an account for the last couple days of my life. I have to do stuff when I think about it, or its gone from memory. My mom calls it SOMETIMERS....sounds about right!

I have a pretty BAD knack of letting EARTHLY things get to me. I know I need to lay it all at the feet of the cross and stop worrying about it, but it seems my mind doesn't udnerstand that too well. I experience greed, jealously, anger, and I say to myself DON'T and I can't stop. I feel like I am missing out on THINGS, and wonder WHY? Why don't they invite me? Why am I not part of their "thing". And then I wonder WHY? Why do I care? We are only here for a small moment and eternity will be everything I WANT and NEED down here and don't get. So why do those feelings of inadequacy and envy keep coming? Why do I care? Why do I let it bother me?

Finally, I just want to say how heart-broken I am for Hannah Grace's family. I have been following her mom's blogs for a month or more and was checking several times a day for updates. It amazes me how her mom seems to be offering us her heart and soul and even in her darkest days seems to be trying to comfort us, when we should be comforting her. I want my walk with Christ to be that strong. I want to know that even in my darkest hour I will still call out Jesus' name and fall on my knees and know that everything will be okay. Thank you for showing us God's grace during the most difficult time and thank you for showing us your faith..I can't wait to meet Hannah face to face one day when my life ends and my eternity begins!

Okay...I have to go and get my quilts done and my paper done that is due tomorrow...uggh!!